Welcome to a deeper blogpost...
perhaps because I am preparing for a milestone birthday myself (thirty, yikes!) and am feeling a bit a bittersweet mix of emotions in seeing my little son become a toddler, I am taking this blog post from the usual characteristic flavor of levity to something a bit more vulnerable and exposed with some reminiscent melancholies and meanderings...
I guess as I reminisce about the happenings of my son's birth one year ago, I am just overwhelmed with a sense of gratefulness that I was able to experience such a thing. I, who had started to give up hope that I would ever bear a human life into this world...The miracle of birth...what a cliche you say. And yet, if you really stop to think about it...I still can't believe what a miraculous thing it is. Especially in light of a history of infertility, I am endlessly grateful that I was able to experience this miracle... I am in awe of God's working.
"For you created my inmost being; you knit me together in my mother's womb.
I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made; your workmanship is marvelous--how well I know it."
David, the Psalmist - Psalm 139:13-14
So...as I was saying, after my son's birth, I had a pretty rough first month of recovery, involving significant anemia, blood loss, two almost-visits to the ER and culminating in a surgical procedure to 'finish things off' if you will. (I will spare you medical jargon, and that's a gift, coming from a nurse practitioner :) During that first month, due to my weakness and poor medical condition, I feel that I didn't get to enjoy it as thoroughly as I might have otherwise. I remember sitting helplessly on the cough watching my mother, sisters, husband and in-laws bathe and dress my newborn little son and wishing that I could be a more active part.
He was NOT a fan of that first bath.
I'm not complaining about watching from afar; I watched them do a lot of other stuff for me too, like change diapers, wash dishes and prepare meals for me :) and by the way, I was overwhelmed by the thoughtfulness and generosity of so many people in my church and circle of friends who stopped by with meals, gifts and well-wishes. Anyways, I would have loved to have really been able to cherish that time more. It just seemed to fly by. Those would be my words of advice to any brand new mom. Just relax and cuddle with that babe. Don't fret about nursing patterns, or sleep routine, or guests seeing a dirty bathroom, or any other blessed thing. Just soak up that time. Because before long, it's over and you won't even believe it ever happened.
Given the rough recovery, I don't think I shared a lot on my blog in those first weeks. So today, as I fondly remember that day one year ago when my son made his first little stink-face appearance into this world
(Yes, and I do mean stink-face.) (And no, I'm not talking about my hideously post-partum mug.)
Or when I remember those powerful emotions washing over me the first time I met that boy
and then seeing them play across my husband's face in turn...
Awe. Amazement. Happiness. Love.
I did not take this picture, but I love it because it really captures in his features all the pride and joy of a new father.
Meeting as a family for the first time...
Precious moments with my newborn son
Another incredible gift of that amazing night of Will's birth was being able to watch my parents' reactions as they met their first grandchild for the very first time.
Working on this post has been fun for me, because it has allowed me to revisit and edit some of the
many pictures that were taken during those first few weeks of little Will's life.
Allow me to share some of them with you now...
Here's a collage of many first-time meetings between William and all the very important people in his life.
I love this one because it helps me remember a time that didn't last long...yup, cuddle time.
One that I took during his newborn shoot at 2 weeks. There are many I took and am just now taking the time to edit. I love this one.
This was taken with my crappy camera phone. But it's priceless to me - this was the first day home from the hospital, so he is only 4 days old here. Awwww....
This is one of my favorites because he looks so tiny, innocent and helpless :)
This was a toast on the day he was born...I will close with this toast - a toast to our first son's birth, and now to a completion of a blessed first year with him.